photo credit: PieDogMedia

Making friends is not always easy- so here’s a step-by-step guide on how to make the right moves. What’s more, this advice will help you make friends anytime, anywhere.

Here goes…

Step 1

Identify the person you want to make friends with- Look through the roomful of people or area full of people and decide whom you’d like to befriend.

Step 2

Once you have recognised your intended target, establish eye contact and smile at him or her warmly.

NOTE: Your smile must be heartfelt; a fake smile is easily noticeable and is off-putting. If you don’t know how to smile genuinely at random people, try this trick- fool yourself into thinking you are looking at a close friend of yours or think of your close friends and then proceed to smile.

Step 3

You will find out how they will reciprocate as you smile at them. Their smile is a dead giveaway, if it is friendly and genuine- they are most likely to be open to communicating with you.

How do you know if their smile is genuine? Cop this awesome lesson straight out of a body language manual: a genuine smile results in the jaw and cheek movements creating creases along the eyes similar to crow’s feet. A fake smile uses only the muscles at the corners of the mouth.

Step 4

Now, it is your cue to say something. Remember the onus lies on you to take this forward.

It is best to something that will resonate with the person. For example, if the weather is really hot and the person is wiping off sweat, something like- “God, it’s really hot! Isn’t it?” would have the highest chance of working. Keep your tone of voice as friendly as possible.

Step 5

If the person replies, go ahead and start a conversation. Again, let the conversation be something situation- specific. The situation you share is what binds the both of you. To develop the example a little further, supposing you both are at a friend’s party- so, once the person agrees emphatically with you about the heat, you can steer the conversation toward how he/she knows your friend.

Maintain eye contact while talking and add a generous helping of warm smiles whenever appropriate.

Step 6

Remember not to inundate the person with information. Do not keep talking. A conversation is a dialogue between two people not one person harping on in a monologue.

So, create a situation in which both of you share equal information.

To do this is simple- make open ended statements that allow the other person to add their own observations.

Refer to the first example I have given- there is a reason why it is- “God, it’s really hot! Isn’t it?” instead of just “God, it’s really hot!”

Step 7

Pay attention to the person throughout the time you have with them. Listen to what they have to say and keep talking to them in intervals- the frequency of the talking depending upon how receptive the person is being.

Here is another trick, if the person wants or needs something- be the one to help them out. So, “Would you like me to get you some cold water?” for the person who was wiping sweat is perfect. It makes you look extremely thoughtful in the person’s eyes and they will appreciate it.

Step 8

Go with the flow and make the person feel as comfortable as you can. To do this you must first be comfortable with yourself. Be yourself.

Once you hit it off, there is no turning back. Then, you are free to build on the relationship that you have established.

Good luck and have fun!

By- Rupangi Sharma